Why is the clock moving so damn slow?

Only a few hours and I’ll be submitting to her again.

I don’t know what she has in mind, I never do.

At this point I don’t care as long as she does it. Tie me up, beat me, tease me, fuck me.

There’s a good chance she’ll do all of it, leading up to it I’m craving all of it. When I’m actually with her I’m just a passenger and I’m more than happy to go wherever she wants to go.

I’m always craving things, aching for them beforehand but when the time comes I’m just happy to be there in whatever position she wants me in.

Will she be whispering to me to fuck her harder or will she be whispering to me asking how much I like getting fucked hard by her?

There will be a moment when she lets me release and shortly after moments later she may want me to again.

Will she want to watch? She has a way of making me feel objectified when she’s watching me.

The taste of her skin, her hands on my head while my head is between her legs.

There will be cuddling and in the morning I’ll make breakfast.

I can’t wait.

Why is the clock moving so damn slow?

Random Stuff For The New Year

Just a few random thoughts to throw your way.

-I’ve added a mini-banner to ClubFEM NYC on the left-hand side. I once wrote about my first experience going to one of their parties here. They have probably the biggest munch in NYC and their parties are memorable to say the least. I’m planning on going to more munches and more parties again this year (I need to get over the shyness of showing my bare ass in public) and hope to see you there.

-I’m running a bit low on Found Femdom images in the media. If you come upon any, feel free to email them to me. My address can be found on the right hand side in my Facebook profile link.

-My back is getting a bit better every day. Thanks to everyone who’s emailed advice and concern. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy to know you care. Or maybe that’s just the Vicodin.

-You may notice that I’ve been sounding considerably less desperate lately. That’s due to my being less desperate. While I’ve been having a number of new experiences lately it’s hard for me to post about them for some reason. I have a few unfinished drafts yet they remain that way until I can finish processing them. I will say that I’ve got a rope burn on my wrist that’s been there for a few weeks now, my mouth and other parts have been put to good use a few times, not to mention having had a tender bottom on more than one occasion.

-My tax return will be here in less than a month. It won’t be much but I keep having an internal fight over what I should do with the cash.

Pay off some debt? Or maybe use the money to get almost half-way to saving up for….


…a Macbook Pro.

Fuck it’s so tempting.

What do do what to do??

This is where being in a Female led relationship would come in handy. She could simply tell me the smart thing to do would be to pay off deb but nooooooo I need to be single right now and deal with temptation. I don’t do well with temptation.

A friend suggested I put up a donate button on the blog but I don’t feel comfortable doing that. Plus, if i did, every post would be about how I need people to donate so I can get my Mac fetish fix. This blog would become the kinky version of an NPR pledge drive.

Muffled Thank You

After lots of kissing she gave me the green light to go down on her.

Watching her back arch while we both moaned at the same time. Feeling her legs tighten around my head. Her heavy breathing mixed with words of praise. Prying my face from between her legs for a few minutes before I could go back for round two…then three then….I lost count.

I did my best not to go all subbie on her, not to thank her a thousand times but to let my mouth thank her without using words. If she knew how badly I wanted to feel used, controlled and taken by her, she may freak out.

Being submissive usually means my mind and my body are in conflict with one another. My body wants to ask if she’ll fuck me, if she’ll want to go down on me or if she’ll let me fuck her. My mind just wants to please her. I never ask for what my body wants, I figure if she wants it too she’ll do it. Besides, my body always wants to be in this position anyway.

I wish I had more than one mouth so I could suck on her toes, breasts, neck and earlobes while going down on her. Then again, I would look pretty silly with five mouths.

I ignore the urge to ask for a million dirty things and get lost in the rhythm of my mouth sucking her clit into my mouth while flicking it with my tongue. I look up and see that she’s lost too. I want to thank her but my mouth is busy doing other things and thanking her would stop the rhythm.

Hopefully she can feel how thankful I am.

More Spoiling And Some Toe Curling


I had no clue that there would be so much interest in this subject. It was a post I just threw up there, something that happened to me years ago.

A number of people have made their opinions known on the subject.

Eileen’s take on the subject makes me wish there were more Eileens in the world. (Stop hogging her Maymay)

There are lots of other people chiming in like PaganKinktress, Juxtaposedme, Rona, Kansas and Coriander.

I do have to disagree with Coriander’s assertion:

“Submissive men don’t adore women in cheap shoes. They adore the ones in the 1000$ thigh-high boots, the perfect bodies in the expensive lingerie, the Bitches with designer handbags, the Fetish Queens in latex and leather. I have not yet seen a single site devoted to the worship of a woman in cheap sneakers and white cotton comfortably cut panties. The women they worship have perfectly manicured nails and lips painted to succulent redness.”

I could care less about the clothes. In fact, isn’t naked better than anything else? I’d drool over a woman who’s confident in cheap sneakers and sweatpants over thigh-high boots any day. Plus, thigh-highs don’t show as much leg so….

Where was I?

Oh yeah.

I was pretty naive when the woman in question asked me to get coffee and go shopping. I was still new to New York and couldn’t imagine someone wanting me to pay for their shopping spree upon first meeting. Now if someone were to mention shopping, I’d know what she meant by it. Someone much wiser in the ways of the world pointed out the fact that she didn’t hide the idea of shopping from me. It’s just that I was too new to the area to know what shopping meant.

A submissive guy emailed me and it started an interesting conversation:

Him: I’m curious, how much were the shoes? And how hot was she?

Me: They were around 250 I think and she was very attractive.

Him:So she was very hot and dominant? And the price of admission was this pair of shoes? Ok, so assume the average ‘date’ is costing you $75. That’s like three mediocre dates that don’t give you anything… while this hottie who is dominant is willing to give you a chance. Hey, just the opportunity to walk behind her carrying her shoes would be kind of hot. Just a thought.

Me: I think you’re forgetting one point. I had nowhere near 250 bucks.

Him: Charge it.

Me: Buddy, I couldn’t if my life depended on it.

Him: Fair enough.

An email from someone I used to be intimate with ended this topic on a much happier note:

“Your pussy eating skills are worth more than a truckload of expensive shoes. She’s unfortunate for missing out on something far more valuable”.

I’m feeling much better about my empty wallet after reading that.

Found Femdom: Mount Everest

A big thanks to the reader who send this one in. WOW! This made my week.

Apparently this was a shoot for a number of different products in some fancy shmancy magazine.

Cream cotton blend jacket from CoStume National Homme.. blah blah blah blah blah blah. Cream chiffon dress by Alessandro Dell’ Acqua.

But who gives a flying fuck about all that, the important part is that the woman on top is Adriana Lima.

Is there anyone who knows how I can get a job as a facesitting model? If I were that guy I might as well go home after a photo shoot like that. Call it a day, you’re done. You’ve reached the peak of Everest. Now you can just retire and spend the rest of your days telling tales about the day a Victoria’s Secret model sat on your face.

“Hey Bob, what did you do at work today?”

“Oh the usual, Adriana Lima’s vagina was rubbing against my mouth for a few minutes and I have photographic proof to back it up. Now if you’ll excuse me I’m going to spend the next few days jerking off nonstop”.