Blowjob Lessons

Ok this is going to sound like a scene out of a porn movie. I still can’t believe it happened much less to myself.

So Sade and a friend were taking one night and her friend confides in her that she’s thinking of dating a guy after taking a break from men and seeing mostly women. One thing she’s concerned about is how her oral skills have held up since she’s out of practice.

Sade, being the kind friend she is, offers my cock (or rather her cock) to practice on.

Blowjob lessons.

I still remember the haze of disbelief I was in after Sade informed me this friend of her’s would be practicing her oral skills on me. I immediately became hard..and nervous. Sade hadn’t let me orgasm in days and I didn’t know how I would be able to hold back.

It wasn’t long before I was naked and on my back while Sade slowly gave instructions on teasing, nibbling, biting using her tongue grabbing my nipples and everything else that goes along with her technique.

It’s still such a blur but I remember a few things:

-Sade ordering me not to come without permission
-Nipples being pinched and pulled
-Sade’s friend smiling when she saw how I reacted to different stimuli.
-Balls being pulled.
-Sade’s friend sucking so hard my eyes were rolling into the back of my head.
-Sade asking me to describe our latest sexual adventures to her friend while she toyed with me and how I could barely think much less talk. She asked me again and again and the most I could get out was a “mmbblllaahhhhhhhuuhhhhhh” sound before I could form the words “I can’t think right now”.

Days later we were told her lessons worked great on her next date.

This is one of many many many memories with Sade that will creep up on me in the most inconvenient of locations and force me to desperately try and hide an obvious erection.

Coincidentally Sade and I are starting a band call The Obvious Erections.

Could I Skull-Fuck?

One of Sade’s fantasies is for me to..well..not co-top with her as much as be an extension of herself when topping. Ok maybe that’s co-topping.

We have had some experiences together with a 3rd person in the mix with us. Some things came very naturally, like when I was sucking on sub-girl’s nipples while she was tied to our bed and Sade jumped on the other nipple and our eyes met. I parted my lips just a bit so Sade could see what I was doing with my tongue and my teeth. I saw a wicked smile flash in her eyes as she matched what I was doing. We were a team making this girl squirm and moan together. It was hot! I remember thinking at that moment “Are we co-toppping right now”? Ok I was thinking other things but I remember thinking it after.

It was fun and it was hot. I knew what she wanted to do and I was an extension of her overall play-plan. Sade had me do other hot things to her as well but the nipple thing, that was me. I actually initiated it. I had surprised myself. Most of the time I was co-subbing (also hot) but for a moment I think….maybe…I was co-topping…a bit.

There have been other instances with the sub-girl but I’m still working on those posts.

Somehow we got on the subject of skull-fucking…as it happens..and Sade mentioned that she didn’t think I could do it. I’ll admit I was slightly insulted, as though my masculinity was being called into question.

My initial thought was to say “Oh yeah? Call the sub-girl, have her come over and I’ll throw my cock down her throat right now.”

Before I said it I realized we may have different ideas on what skull-fucking actually is.

The internet seems to define it thusly:

skull-fuck (third-person singular simple present skull-fucks, present participle skull-fucking, simple past and past participle skull-fucked)
1: to actively penetrate someone’s mouth; to have vigorous oral sex
2: to penetrate someone’s eye socket

Now I’m 99% sure Sade was talking about the first entry there….ok 90% sure.

Still, I know Sade , I thought for a second and said “Wait, do you mean making someone gag and throw up because I’m doing it so hard?”

She confirmed it.

“Yeah I don’t think I could make someone throw up because of it. That might be a bit much.”

And that’s when she said the quote of the night: “At least I don’t need to worry about you getting all worked up and skull-fucking me.”

So all day today I’ve been wondering about it. Could I do if she had me horny enough? Or in deep enough sub-space after beating me so my mind was numb? Would hurting someone that much be an erection-killer for me?

As usual when I find a fantasy of Sade’s that may be a little more on the challenging side, I’ve been obsessing about it a little. I really want to be able to help make her desires come true.

Looking Up At Her Looking Down On Me

I had just finished kissing her from her toes to the back of her neck. I was dizzy. My hands stroked her warm skin, my lips and tongue would get stuck on an area of her body then my eyes would see a spot I had missed and I’d jump to that spot as well.

I wanted to go longer but she turned around and flipped me on my back without saying a word and moved her body over my mouth. She exhaled deeply as my lips and tongue found the one spot I hadn’t kissed yet.

I moaned my gratitude.

Opening my eyes I saw her looking down at me. I wanted to touch her elsewhere as well but her legs were pinning my arms down. I couldn’t help but whimper or moan or….whatever it was I was doing. Had I been able to think I would have tried express how hot she looked with my eyes, or how addictive she tasted or how grateful and turned on I was.   

She smiled a little and our eyes met.

Days, weeks later I could easily get turned on by just thinking of any part of her body straddling me, but it’s that look in her eyes that make me whimper.

Even while writing this.

There’s No Gentlemanly Way To Ask…

Asking for something I’m curious about is pretty much impossible for me. Asking for something I already enjoy is equally difficult.

It comes down to a few things.

-It’s hard to not sound like a do-me sub if I were to ask for something.   

-If a guy asks a woman then it’s creepy. If a woman asks a guy, then it’s hot.

-I genuinely don’t want a woman to do something just for my benefit, I’d much rather she do it because it’s what she wants.

-There’s no gentlemanly way to ask someone to fist you.

I’m using fisting as an example just because I recorded a podcast with someone who talked about it and then had another conversation with a friend yesterday and wondering how I’d experience that popped in my brain.

You can use any number of other things to replace fisting. CBT, sounds, mummification, strap-on play, teasing, or just a good old fashioned beating.

How do you ask someone to do something dirty to you like a gentleman? How do you do it without sounding like you’re just being greedy and not interested in only getting your desires met?

I mentioned this on Twitter and had a few interesting replies. I’ll take their names out since I didn’t get their permission to repost. (yeah..I’m a badass mofo)

“Terribly sorry, old bean, but could you be a chum and just give my prostate a little squeeze? There’s a love.”

“Pardon me, don’t mean to be a bother, but could I perhaps have a hand? In my ass, that is.”

“Do be a dear and shove your fist up my ass. It would be greatly appreciated if you could at your earliest convenience.”

“My darling, what lovely fingers you have there. If it pleases you, feel free to massage my prostate with them”

But it’s not just kinky sex. I remember having a conversation years ago with a vanilla woman I was sleeping with. She asked why I never asked her to go down on me.

Her: “Why don’t you ever ask me to suck your cock?”

Me: “Well, I figure you’d do it if you wanted to.”

Her:”But I think it’s hot to hear a guy ask me to suck his cock”

Me: “Will you please suck my cock?”

Her:”No, not now.”

There’s another side having desires.

While playing, I really don’t think about anything other than what’s happening. I get lost in the moment and forget what it was I wanted in the first place. Or maybe I get into some submissive headspace where what she desires becomes what I desire and what I was curious about doesn’t matter anymore. It’s like my sexual desires become whatever is happening, whatever she’s doing to me or having me do to her in the moment is exactly what I crave.

True, if I”m being teased or something, then I’ll really want to fuck or to go down on her, but I don’t crave any other kind of play.

Maybe that’s a good thing. I’m lucky that I’m never wishing for something else while someone is playing with me.

So is there a way to ask someone to play with you without sounding creepy? Or to ask for something specific without sounding like you’re a do-me sub?


I’ve been asked by two different people recently about my fantasies or things I’ve always wanted to try. That’s such a hard one to answer.

It’s hard because it depends on when you ask me and it’s even harder because of the question it raises. What if one of the things I’ve always wanted to try would be something that the dominant wouldn’t ever want to do?

What if I’ve always wanted to go to an orgy and go down on mulitple women? What if that’s something she’d never want me to do yet it’s something I have on my “list of things to do before I die”?

Ok no “what if”. It is something I want to do before I die.

It’s not just a fantasy, or a desire, it’s a need.

I’m just using the oral orgy daydream as an example.

Here’s another. It’s the fantasy of a woman who has a female submissive and I do all sorts of sexual for her. You know, she sits and watches as she directs the action then eventually directs the female submissive and I to take care of her.

Hot right?

Well, yeah, for me. But what if it’s not for the person who’s asking me about my desire? If she’s turned off by the idea am I basically saying “ok, you’re not in that one then”?

Does it hurt to find out you’re not into some of the same things?

Personally I’m just happy with being a part of some of the sexual daydreams of someone I’m intimate with. But does it work the same way in reverse?

What starts out as a fun sexual exploration of wants and desires turns into something else.

Or does it?

It’s late.   

I’m blabbering.