Thoughts

With Friends Like These…I’m A Happy Guy

I have a friend who will occasionally ask me to be a practice bottom for her, usually with rope.

You know how there are people in the scene who are total nutjobs? They’re unstable, can’t hold a conversation, have no sense of humor and give the lifestyle a bad name?

Yeah, she’s the opposite of that.

The first time I met her was at a social gathering a friend was having. We hit it off pretty quickly. She enjoys providing service as well so while other people were talking about anal hooks and heavy bondage, we were talking about the best products to use while cleaning a tub (Soft Scrub by the way).

Later she told me she was exploring her interest in rope bondage and asked if I’d be interested in being a practice bottom for her.

Boy would I!!!

I’d come over to her apartment, we’d drink tea and she’d practice her skills. There were times when I’d think how funny it might be for an outsider to be watching. If there was a hidden camera you’d see an attractive woman tying up a guy while they discussed backup methodologies for her laptop (she owns a mac, so she’s extra cool).

I’ll occasionally be her practice dummy before she has a date. She’ll have something in mind for the lucky submissive woman and want to try it out on me first. I was flogged for what felt like more than an hour thanks to the fact that she had a date with a masochist the next day. It was intense and amazing. Occasionally I caught myself debating the merits of a sex change since she’s really not into guys.

Another time she had me tied up in a position she was planning for her next play date. My legs were up in the air and I was on my back. She very casually asked if It was easy for me to spread my legs or not. I laughed when I realized she was actually asking, “If you had a vagina, would I have easy access to it now?”

Something she’ll say from time to time reminds me of a song by Todd Rundgren.

Her: So when was the last time you played?

Me: The last time you tied me up.

Her:……We gotta get you a woman.

She’s one of those people who make it impossible not to smile around, she just has this vibe about her. She always seems to be doing things that makes me feel lazy, like I should be doing more with my free time. It wouldn’t surprise me if she called me up one day and said “Hey I might be late for tea tomorrow, I’m going to cure cancer by noon and climb Everest with a few heads of state to fix the whole Israeli-Palestinian thing.”

One of the complex aspects to playing with someone is how I’ll sometimes feel the urge to say “please just fuck me”, even though that wouldn’t happen. Since I know my friend isn’t into guys, that complex part isn’t there. It’s just comfortable. It’s nice. It’s lacking in that other tension.

I do sometimes wish I had a vagina though.

More Non-Kinky Things: Photo Edition

Just a few non-sexy thoughts I’ve been having.

I’ve decided to expand my fashion a bit. From now on I’m not going to have just black or blue All-Stars.

I’ve added gray.

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The new IPhone. I used half of my economic stimulus package to get it. The other half went to paying off debt (sexy huh?). Meanwhile, if you have an iphone, I’ve made and Iphone theme to my blog. It’ll load faster now if you have an Iphone and will compress it down for ya. See?

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I love these two photos. Such a contrast.

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I’m getting more and more excited for my big trip to London and Paris next month. If you know of anything going on between August 8-11 (in London) and August 11-14 (Paris), then by all means email me.

How Do You Flirt With Milk?

I’ve decided that sex is a higher priority than kinky sex at this point. I’ve been doing the vanilla thing lately. I’ve joined a few vanilla dating sites. One where I hint at who I really am, one where I come right out and say it and other where I seem like just another guy. The third one is the one with all the emails.

I’m working on my flirting skills as well. Normally I don’t flirt that much with people I run into randomly but I’ve decided I need to change how I interact with the world.

One thing I’ve been doing lately is smiling at a woman walking down the street toward me and see how long it takes for her to smile back. If she’s walking with her head up I can usually get her to smile 60-70 percent of the time. It’s a good thing to make someone smile. It gives me an emotional hard-on to be able to get someone who wasn’t smiling to beam with a big grin.

My most recent attempt at flirting was at Starbucks. I was standing in front of a woman in line and I couldn’t help but want to strike up a conversation with her . I thought and thought of a good way to initiate one. Then it struck me…Milk! I’ll offer her milk for her coffee!

I slowly walked to the table in the back with my coffee and acted like I was checking out something on my phone. I poured half and half into my cup, taking my time so it wouldn’t look like I was just standing there holding a big thing of half and half waiting for her. She ordered some fancy half-caf-moca-chapa-rapa-chino-late-grande-non-fat-thingy so it was taking a while. I timed it perfectly so I was just finishing my pour when I asked if she wanted half an half.

I imagined what her reaction wold be:

“You’re offering me half and half? You’re clearly very in tune with my wants and needs. You must come home with me now so we can roll around in my bed for hours. I’ll use your abilities to know what pleases me to quench this deep carnal thirst. For a few hours you will be mine and we won’t stop until every muscle in our bodies is worn out from succumbing to this lustful ache. You will fuck me and I will fuck you. And in the morning, you will cook me breakfast.”

What she actually did, was smile at me and reach for the non-fat milk.

I did get a smile though.

Ouch That Feels Good

For those of you who kept emailing me and asking who it was that inspired my thank you post.

The answer can be found here along with photo evidence.

I should write another thank you post to her.

Helping My Dominant Guy Friends

I am hereby vowing to only post positive posts for the rest of the month. As suggested by Eileen.

I’ve been chatting quite a bit with Bad Man lately. After I made a comment to him regarding the number of submissive women I run across on Nerve, he asked if I could pass alone the usernames of the women who emailed me hoping that I was a dominant. He’d pass along the any dominant women he came across as well. I’m always up for helping a friend so I’ve passed along the usernames of the women who confided in me that they were submissive. I don’t consider it a violation of their trust, if anything I’m helping them find a dominant guy.

I have changed my profile though so it shows more of my submissive side so I doubt I’ll be getting as many emails from submissive women.

I know a lot of submissive women. I’ve set a few up on dates with my dominant friends. There are a few dominant guys I know who will come up to me at an event and ask “Pssst, hey, do you know her?” hoping that I can introduce them.

It’s tricky thing to setup a dominant with a submissive however.

One dominant friend of mine who’s into the more D/s relationship side of things says that most of the submissive women out there are “do-me” subs. Meaning that they’re not as interested in pleasing and serving as they are about getting dominated the way they want to be dominated. I suppose the same could be said for many submissive guys too though.

My matchmaking skills aren’t all that good when it comes to setting up kinky friends. I’ve helped a number of my friends meet others for hot sex or hot play but nothing that resulted in a relationship.

I don’t know many submissive guys however but every time I’ve tried to setup a one of my female dominant friends with one of my submale friends it’s always been a bit awkward.

“Why in the hell would you ever think he and I would be a match?” one friend asked me.

I defended myself, “I don’t know, you both like art”.

It was clear that this was not enough for her, “He’s not a masochist, he can’t hold a conversation and he’s got a penis the size of an eraser”.

“Ok first of all, why would I have a clue how big the guy’s penis is, not to mention his pain threshold , but… Wait, you still played with him even though he couldn’t hold a conversation?”

“Shut up.”

It’s for this reason that I don’t setup my dominant female friends anymore. I just don’t know many submissive guys.

As for my dominant male friends, I’m always keeping an eye out for them.