Thoughts

Masocast-tastic

Another Masocast podcast is up.

This one is a bit different. I talk about the future of the podcast and ask for your suggestions. There’s a free public service announcement with Sade. I talk to a friend about her experiencing video-chatting with strangers and a conversation with Dov about Shibaricon.

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Fuck That Was Close

A very good friend of mine, someone I’ve known for most of my life, is in town. While he’s like a brother, he has no clue about my….lifestyle.

When he and I are together we tend to be very silly and to those who aren’t in on our jokes, we can probably come across as total buffoons.

Tonight was no exception.

Since we’re both on tight budgets, we decided to paint the town red by going for long walks and stopping in coffee shops to fuel up on caffeine.

We were standing in line for the bathroom at Starbucks. He was behind me in line and doing something silly with..well I can’t even remember what the hell we were doing. Maybe we were talking about our favorite Bill Hicks moments or doing fake spit-takes with our coffee cups or…fuck I don’t know. All I knew is that we were brothers once again and it felt damn good. I had missed these moments with my friend and we were making up for lost time.

All of a sudden, I froze.

Holy fuck.

Standing right behind my friend was a well-known person in our little BDSM world.

No, I’m not going to name-drop.

Now I’m not egotistical to think this person would have any clue who I am, but I know we’ve met a few times and exchanged pleasantries. Under any normal circumstances I would have said “Hi, blah blah blah nice to see you again and blah blah….” But with my friend there, I had hoped they wouldn’t recognize me. What if this person said “Hey aren’t you the guy that translated ASL for my class at….” then revealing to my bestest buddy that I’m into “….”.

Now I realize that they’re probably not the type to just blurt out stuff like that, it was still something that made me paranoid.

My friend asked me why I stopped goofing around and I just told him to shut up and I’d tell him later. He looked at me and said “You’ve never NOT wanted to goof off. What’s wrong?”

I looked at him in a way that I hoped would make him just drop it but he didn’t.

I ran into the bathroom and did what I needed to do. The bathroom was filthy and I didn’t linger. My friend ran in quickly and I wanted to say something to my fellow kinkster, apologizing for my friends behavior but he came out before I could say something he came back out and started joking to this person about the filthiness of the bathroom. Sure I knew he was just trying to be charming but I’m pretty sure he came across as someone on an hour pass from the mental ward.

I dragged him away as we all parted ways.

“You have no idea who you were just goofing around with do you?”, I asked.

“Them? No, who was that? Is that why you were acting so weird and trying to get me to shut up?”

“Just a friend of a friend”, I said.

While all night I had wished Sade had been with us as well, I then realized Sade would have been recognized….and possibly had been called this name that my buddy had never heard before.

So that’s why I’ve been saying “Fuck, that was close” for the last few hours….and why I’m still a bit embarrassed.

Thankfully I’m not that well known.

A Fresh New Masocast Is Live

I’ve updated the Masocast website. I’d love to know what you think. Plus I’ve added a form on the sidebar so you can submit questions that you’d like me to ask guests on the show.

In this episode I sit down with Mistress Wynter and we talk about biker bars, bad lifestyle events, bad service submissive men, the drive of fetishes and more.

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In A Fog

I can barely remember everything she did. Probably because i’m still in a bit of a fog.

As I write this Sade and I are on our way back home, riding the subway early in the morning.

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I remember how we had been taking to two of our good friends when she turned to me and said “Well, I think it’s time to string you up and beat you”.

I remember the ropes pulled above my head.

I remember the gag in my mouth prying my jaws apart,h the leather blindfold, how she would work over the skin of my my back until it felt like it was on fire then feeling a break in the beating she was giving me much to my relief only to have my skin met with her teeth clamping down on me.

Wait was that just an incredibly odd run on sentence?
Fuck it I’m still flying.

She bit down on me hard, I could feel her mouth vibrate when she moaned from the sensation. Just when my moans were about to turn into cries she let go and blew a gentle bit of air over the sensitive skin then clamped down on a different part of my back giving it the same treatment.

She flogged me for a while longer until she picked up another implement. I couldn’t tell what it was, since all of her toys were sitting behind me

“This is going to sting.”

And it did.
At some point she leaned in and whispered to me, asked me if I wanted more. I didn’t need to think it over very long.

At one point I felt her sucking and biting on my nipples while still feeling the sting of her flogger. What was happening? Did she invite someone else in our little play space? I panicked for a half a second until I felt a slap on my opposite side. It was her hand AND her mouth. Now that I’m no longer in the moment I’m amazed at her ability to multi-task.

I’d growl from the pain and she’d moan with approval. I’d bark and she’d purr.

My wrists strained against the rope, pulling me up to my toes when the pain got to the highest point.

As I write this now, I realize that there wasn’t a single part of me that wanted it to stop. Usually there’s this small 1% of me, the fight or flight part. Call it instiinct, self preservation or my monkey brain, but usually there’s that 1% that wants it to stop but not this time. Not even .000000001 % wanted it to stop.

It was wonderful.

Another Masocast, Get It While It’s Hot

Another Masocast podcast is up. This time a conversation my friend Evermore and I had with photographer Adrian Buckmaster.

We talk about traditional english discipline, the key to taking photos of people in a sexually charged atmosphere and more.

Plus I beg fore more cash…yeah…you saw that one coming.

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