Long Time, No Post

It’s been ages since I posted, I know. But I have a good excuse.


That’s pretty much it. I work the equivalent of two full-time jobs. A day-job and I freelance every night and all weekend. It leaves little time for much else. In fact I’m taking a break from working to write this post. I’ve had a number of concerned emails from people worrying about why I’ve been MIA so I figured I’d take a break from work to fill in the blanks.

Sade has been pretty much in the same situation. Between work and school there’s little time for socializing. There are some of our close friends who we used to see every week who we haven’t seen in months.

2015 was supposed to be the year my back got better post-surgery yet that didn’t work out. I continue to go to the doctor for pain mediation and decide what my next step should be surgery-wise but it’ll be a while before I can save up enough for the surgery.

I’ve had to cut back on the podcast as well. Where I used to put out an episode every other week I’m now forced to release one every other month at best. So instead of 24 episodes per year It’ll be 6 in 2016 if I’m lucky.

This is not due to a lack of interest in the podcast nor has it been due to the lack of great people to interview, I have a number of interviews in the vault just waiting to be released but no time to edit them.

I wish I could say I’ll be able to get back to a “normal” life sometime soon, back to socializing, play-parties, quality time with Sade and friends but that doesn’t seem like it’ll happen any time soon. I don’t work this much because I want to, I do it because I have no other choice. As long as the medical bills keep piling up I’ll need to pay for them.

I am grateful that I’m able to have two full-time jobs. I have friends who have trouble finding work at all so having too much work is much better than too little.

So that’s, that. Who knows I may win the lottery or I’ll get some sweet gig that would change all of this but in the meantime if you’re wondering why I haven’t posted, it’s because I’m working.

Subliminal Sex

Sometimes she walks into the livingroom naked and announces she’s horny.

Other times she says she wants me to go down on her or that it’s time to fuck.

It’s at a point now where she’ll walk in the room after showering and before getting dressed and I just assume its fuck-time only to realize shortly after I stand that she’s just in the room to say something. It’s rare that she walks in naked without a sexual demand so it’s a shock when there isn’t.
The other day she walks in the room naked and I start to put my laptop down only to find it’s a false alarm.

“Oh…is there ANYTHING ELSE you need? Anything?”

She’s got me trained that walking in the living room naked means sex.
It’s not just me though, she equates me not wearing glasses as sex time since it’s one of the few times I’m not wearing glasses.

Actually I don’t know why I haven’t tried it. Take off my glasses while we’re just talking and see if she starts showing signs.

Another trigger is Christmas lights. Not because we fuck under a tree every year but because we have Christmas lights in our room for mood lighting while fucking. Almost always we have them on if fucking at night. One time Sade plugged them in for some other non-sex reasons and I started getting hard.

Words work too. Whenever Sade says “oh fuck” as an exclamation I immediately think of her having an orgasm, even if she’s not saying it with the same enthusiasm that she uses when we’re in bed.

There’s a look Sade gets when she’s fucking me (pegging). It’s a look in her eyes and a smile she really only has in that mode. It’s a combination of sadism, control and arousal. Every now and then that smile will come out in unrelated moments and I’m immediately thrown when I see it since I almost exclusively see it when I’m on my back and her hands are holding my ankles. The smile and the fire in her eyes burns even brighter when she makes me orgasm over and over without any control. We could make a 30 second porn with just that look on her face and probably retire today.

She has a million smiles but that one is reserved for fucking me.

“Want My Slave To Go Down On You?”

Early in our relationship it seemed Sade was offering my oral services to women left and right.

Once at a the end of a party a domme friend expressed feeling frustrated.

“Want him to eat you out? He’s really good”

I just stood there stupefied slightly turned on at the thought and slightly nervous that I wouldn’t live up to the hype.

Sade’s friend was surprised at the offer, thought about it for a moment then declined. Instead Sade had me give her a massage.
Not long later Sade offered oral from me to yet another friend who was also slightly shocked, pondered and declined.

“You sure? I think it’ll help you”. She was sure to only offer friends who were single and in need.

This happened a few times more, Sade just offering up my mouth only to be surprised that she didn’t have any takers.

Eventually she stopped offering at all but she still expresses shock when she remembers there were no takers.

All But The Important Bits

I’m having surgery in a couple days and one of the things they ask is if you have a living will and if you’re an organ donor. I marked that I wanted to donate my body to science. 


Sade asksed me what I put down, I told her and she responded: 


“Everything but your heart and your cock and balls, those are mine forever”. 


Still not sure if that’s creepy or romantic but I suppose if it happens I’ll be dead and won’t care that she has my junk hanging from her rearview mirror. The heart I’m guessing will be a bookend.

Not just a formality

Originally it was just going to be a formality. We were going to City Hall here in NYC to get legally married a week and a half before our ceremony. The ceremony was the “real” wedding and this was just something we had to do in preparation for it.

That’s all, no big deal.

We invited a few close friends, one that can’t make it to the ceremony and a few other close friends. Sade put on a nice dress and I, a jacket and tie.

We ride the subway and I become more excited, giddy and overwhelmed as each stop brings us closer. Sade smiles and asks if she needs to order me not to cry and I admit that would probably help.

We show up and literally pick a number, C803, and we wait. Friends offer to hold paperwork watch the TV screen for our number and keep us company. We laugh, people get misty eyed and so do I. What was supposed to be just a formality has become much more.

We’re surrounded by love, couples of every kind. I notice a few same sex couples and I’m proud to live in a state that recognizes love isn’t a sin.

Our witnesses sign on the dotted line and we wait for the justice to wave us into the ceremony room. Our friends start to sigh, squeal and some start to cry, I’m holding it all together surprisingly well.

The justice asks if we promise to love, honor……and at this point both Sade and I are thinking “don’t say ‘obey’, don’t say ‘obey’”…and she doesn’t and we know what the other is thinking.
I put the rings on Sade and she puts one on me and it’s like I’m in a dream.
The whole experience hits us both harder than we expected. We’re married now…legally.

It probably sounds sappy but it’s quite normal for us to glance at each-other and just smile, we’ve been together for almost five years and that hasn’t gone away, in fact it gets better.

Every now and then one of us will look at the other one and say “We’re married now!” and the other will yell back “I know right?”

What was originally just a formality is actually pretty significant and in under two weeks we’ll be surrounded by friends and family as we have the ceremony.

We’re both over the moon and everything is perfect.