The Super Fuck-Off Shield

That’s what one dominant woman I know calls it.

It’s the look she gives guys when she wants the creepy ones to stay away from her when she’s at a kink event. She admits that it probably keeps the non creepy ones away as well.

I have one friend who has perfected the Super Fuck-Off Shield so well that she can make a guy turn around as he’s approaching her with one look.

The strange thing is, I’ve seen women put up the shield and then later hear them complain that there aren’t any good submissive men to play with.

So how does one convey interest to play without projecting the creep factor?

A dominant friend posed this question recently and she didn’t know the answer. It’s one of those you-know-it-when-you-see-it kinda things.

When I first moved to New York I was horrible at approaching dominant women at kink events. I’d walk up to someone, introduce myself, offer to buy them a drink and when I brought it to them it was like I wasn’t even there. They’d take the drink and move on.

I was apparently creeping them out.

I never made the mistake of doing what some guys do and just walk up to a woman and ask if I can worship her feet or if she wanted to play with me. I knew that part was creepy.

After a few drink-and-disappear situations, I decided it was best to just not approach at all. After all, not approaching gives me the same result as approaching and I get to save my beer money if I don’t approach.

Economics wins again!

There have been times when I’ve stumbled into a conversation or two and I always wonder how to broach the subject of playing but never did.

I thing it would always come out sounding like this:

“Yeah I know, that sub-prime mortgage thing is messed up. So do you want to beat me or something?”

Or

“Soooooo…yeah…..umm… is there anything you’d like to do…to me??? Or…on me?”

Or

“Hmm you know what? I’ll bet you a dollar you can’t beat me until I’m a puddle on the floor. C’mon, put you money where your mouth is. I probably have 45 cents in my pocket right now that says you can’t.”

Either way I sound like a tool.

I know the trick to getting vanilla women. Vanilla women are easy, just act like you have options or that you could care less and that’s pretty much it. It makes me sound like a total ass I know. I only learned this after I gave up dating vanilla women and trying to introduce them to the joys of a submissive guy. As soon as I gave up and stopped caring, they started showing interest.

It doesn’t work that way with dominant women at kink events.

Probably because they have options and could care less.