I love getting hurt…I hate seeing others getting hurt.
If I’m at a play party and someone is experiencing some really intense pain, I almost always need to look away.
Obviously I know that the “victim” is probably enjoying themselves, and I can see how it can be incredibly hot. I just have a difficult time seeing someone else in pain.
Maybe it’s 90% pacifism and 10% “I wish that were me”.
Even as a young boy, if my little brother was going to get punished for something, I’d try to take the blame for it. Seeing him getting the belt or a spanking was much harder for me than getting the same treatment myself.
I have the same reaction when someone else is being humiliated. I feel bad for them, want to make it stop and just want to protect them.
My ability to accept it and watch or not be bothered on it changes depending on my mood, the situation and who is on the receiving end at the time. If it’s someone I know, then I feel very protective of them and have to keep myself from saying something.
So is it pacifism? Empathy? Jealousy?
Is it rare that a masochist feels uncomfortable seeing others get the treatment he’s dying for?