Guy Friends

Guy friend #1: Oh, c’mon. What’s more important, going to see some woman or staying here and getting drunk with your friends?

Me: I’m sure you’ll have fun without me.

I know they really want me to come along because I’m the only single guy in the group. They like to watch me talk to women, flirt with them and live vicariously through me.

Guy friend #2: Well just go over there, bang her, then join us afterwards.

I’m guessing they’d freak out if I told them that she was the one who banged me.

Me: I usually spend the night.

Guy friend #3: She better make you breakfast in the morning.

Me: Actually, usually make her breakfast.

Guy friend #1: She better give you a blowjob in exchange for breakfast.

I’m wondering how it is these guys are in relationships.

Me: Oh I’m sure she’ll have something fun in mind.

Guy Friend #2: You’re pussy whipped.

Me: Oh and if I back out on her to join you, would that make me dick whipped? I’ll take pussy whipped any day.

If they had any idea what would be happening when I saw her, they’d probably shit themselves.

Most of my vanilla female friends know about my “interests”. One in fact referred to my interest in kink as my “unspeakable acts”. Hence the name that I’m now regretting. I have no vanilla guy friends that I can feel comfortable enough with to tell them about myself. Some I’ve known for more than ten years and yet they have no clue.

Maybe that’s why I have more female friends than male. Sure some of my female friends are former friends-with-benefits but I’ve always been able to stay friends afterwards. I prefer the company of women over men in my platonic relationships as well. I’ve never known why.

Maybe because they’re more accepting.

Maybe because they look and smell better.


I tend to have more male friends than female. I think it is cool to relate to the opposite sex so well. A guy like you deserves breakfast and a blowjob….I love your come back to the pussy whipped comment.

And I bet you smell wonderful.

I’ll admit to having a similar experience.

When I talk with female friends about my sex life, they are interested and engaged in the conversation. If the subject comes up with male friends, the conversation quickly turns awkward.

Sometimes it becomes a competition (even in ways like yours – trying to “make” you go out), but occasionally it drives them away.

Once, a good friend asked me to “just stop talking about that stuff” even though I never bring it up and rarely talk about things if the subject is broached.

I wish I knew the reason this happened. Is it some same-gender competition thing? Or is talking about sexual topics with other men homoerotic *enough* to make them uncomfortable?

And yeah, the women smell better. πŸ™‚

I actually think women are more comfortable talking about sex. Well, I think women are more comfortable talking about most stuff. I think women are good talkers. But then, I am sexist, so I’m certainly not the right person to ask.

I think it’s a common thing for men who relate well to women to have more “intimately emotional” talks with them. Some guys are better at feelings and sex talk than others. I don’t know them though. I will say that for me, one of the really great things about being more out is having interactions with kinky guys. Can’t say that I’ve done much real time hanging out with kinky guys but I’ve had some coffees, lunches and dinners. Then the blog and board thing as well. It’s good. And none of ’em smelled bad. πŸ˜‰

Just sounds like typical male talk to me. All brag and bluster, but it’s not really true. If they ARE in relationships like you said, they don’t treat their girlfriends that way.

I guess it’s just a cultural thing. Guys can’t be seen any other way or they’re viewed as weak or “gay”, so they talk the talk because they don’t want to be outcast. Of course, I’m not an expert on male behavior πŸ˜‰

It’d be interesting to know how these friends of yours talk when there are women around, though.

I’m sure Boy Toy’s the same. I can just see him joke around with some guy about me owing him a blow job πŸ˜‰ At least he’s not scared of being called “gay”, he’s one of the least homophobic straight guys I know. Yet despite being on the submissive side, like you, I really, really doubt he’d talk so freely and boisterously about what really goes on between us. Guess it’s just not socially acceptable yet, doesn’t make one look like a big tough guy. Sorry, Axe.

Yeah, I see what you mean. I agree with Jay and Elle– it’s just like a gay guy afraid to discuss his homosexuality with his hetero friends.

The man has to be strong and dominant and the woman must be weak and submissive. Homosexuality brought down that assumption, and so did male submissives and bottoms.

I’m a female submissive, but the closest comparison I can think of to my case is the extreme feminist. I don’t encounter them every day. Your case, however, seems to be much more common.

Your blog is awesome.

I once remarked that the people I tended to trust with really emotive things (and kink falls into that category) are either women, gay, or clergy.

Most of the people who know about my kink are female friends, and like you I tend to have a lot more female friends than male. One of the guys on my (gay) rugby team knows, and a priest (Anglican) friend of mine knows. There are plenty of guys who I get on fine with who have no idea.