An Open Letter To The Person Who Invented Fitted Sheets

Hey, person who invented fitted sheets.

Fuck you, man.

I don’t like you at all. Not in the least.

What were you thinking? I’m supposed to fold this? How?

There have been a number of times when I’m performing service for someone and it requires me to fold one of these Rubik’s Cube-like devices.


I’m not a good folder to begin with. I lack the folding gene. When faced with the fitted sheet I’m totally helpless.

I think I’m going to add this to my small list of hard limits.

Fuck you, guy who invented the fitted sheet.


Lexi taught me how to fold a fitted sheet. She learned it in some submissive skills class. Maybe she can teach you, too.

Axe, I can learn you how to fold fitted sheets. My mother taught me. It took me years to master it, but hot damn, can I fold some sheets.

HAHAHAHAh OMG this gave me a good chuckle this morning. I am right there with you. In fact not long ago I asked Sylvanus how the hell are you supposed to fold these after we had done some laundry. For us, we also have a prob getting the fitted sheets to stay in place! Perhaps we should fuck less…. errr…. no!

Lavender Scorpion March 17, 2008 at 8:05 pm

What’s important to note here, is that Axe clearly has more than one set of sheets.

Always a positive 😉

Hahahahaha! I love this post so much. I can’t fold fitted sheets to save my life. I’d rather fold a diamond. Hard limits–true that!

Oh, I completely suck at folding these! I love them on the bed, hate them in the laundry pile …

xx Dee

You k now, you could always do it hotel-style and use flat sheets for both the mattress and top sheet …

But I’ll teach you how to fold fitted sheets. And towels, Martha Stewart-style. Mmmm. (I have a secret domestic fetish.)

Thank you Troy:)

Though I never fold my own fitted sheets, it’s when I’m providing service to others that I have a problem.

The trick is to tuck the opposite corners into each other like they are spooning, and then once the sheet is folded in half with the corners snug inside each other, proceed like it was flat. My parents were neat freaks, and years later I’m haunted by perfectly tucked in sheets.

I hate folding anything. I have said many times that my one Big turnon in a man that will do my laundering alot of men think it’s funny. but it brings me pleasure.

(My New Ad)

SWF top looking for laundry bitch

extra points for a man that knows how to give a nice STIFF starch!